Things are anything but normal around here. The kids have been going to daycare or my mom has been here taking care of us, which I'm totally grateful for, but it's taking it's toll on the boys. It may have to do with Magooly having to wake up so early in the mornings to go with dad to his babysitter's and not being a morning person.
Mornings are not fun around here. Ben will end up being just like me, sleeping in until I have to be at school/seminary in like 15 minutes. And then he doesn't take a nap during the day so he usually crashes when he gets home at 5 and either sleeps all night, or like tonight, wakes up at 8 and is up until 10. Tomorrow will be hard for him too, thank goodness it's Friday!
So I have a question, what would you do in this situation? Your child, say your 22 month old sweetie pie, comes home from the babysitters with a huge BITE mark on his arm?!
Casel came home yesterday and I immediately saw a red mark on his arm. At a glance it looked like someone had blotted their lipstick on his arm. At closer look I saw tiny teeth marks and huge bruise in the middle. MY POOR BABY. He seemed his usual happy self though. Jeff said that another little boy had bit him when the sitter wasn't watching. He said she told him about it right away when he came to pick them up and that she was sorry and will watch "the biter" more closely next time. I guess this is his first incident and his mother said he bites at home but only his older siblings.
I asked Casey if he got bit and he showed me his wrist on the other arm for me to kiss, and it had a bruise as well. Then he bit himself there and showed it to me again, basically telling me the kid bit him there too! If it happens again I'm going to tell the sitter she better have that kid go somewhere else or we'll have to find other arrangements. Is that too harsh?
Casey's been very cranky lately too, they both are. He's constantly taking his shoes out of the shoe box and giving them to us to put them on him or he'll bring us pants and go to the door and say "bye" like he wants to leave! :( I think my kids are starting to realize that our house isn't as big or fun as the houses they've been visiting. Or as clean for that matter.
I know it's been 4 weeks since my surgery but I still can't lift more than 5lbs, or lift my hands above my head or use my chest muscles like at all. Typing even hurts. And I just had more surgery today so it will be awhile before we are back to normal. So don't judge my floors or pile of dishes in my sink. I do pick up easy stuff but I always regret it later.
I'm missing my routine and being able to wrestle on the floor with my littles and pick them up and squeeze them too me. I hate that they have to be so careful. That when I go in at night to comfort Monkey when he wakes up that now he doesn't even want me to touch him, he's just gotten so independent he can fall asleep on his own. (Well, at least he still likes me reading to him and singing him lullabies)
Today I went back in for more surgery from Dr. Sweetheart to remove more skin. Seriously, she's my all time favorite doc. The reason she had to remove more skin was because my tumor abutted the skin and she needed to make sure she got complete clear margins. It really wasn't all that bad except for the IV part. I have pretty small veins which makes getting IVs a, well, pain. I look like a druggy with track marks all down my left arm. And they won't use my right arm because I had lymph nodes taken out there (4). This makes me nervous because I will be having chemo through IV in my hands.
They finally got one in and knocked me out. This time they gave me a patch to wear behind my ear so I wouldn't get as sick afterward as I did last time. It's the same thing you wear if you get sea sick. It did help that I wasn't under as long this time too. Recovery from the anesthesia was much better. And faster. My surgery was at 7:30am and I was on my way home at 10:30 am. I was still really tired so I slept a lot today.
So about chemo. My previous visit to Dr. Awesome, (Monticelli), he said because of the stage I'm at and the type of cancer, stage 1 and benign indolent cancer, I probably wouldn't need chemo, but they had to wait for my oncatype dx test results before making that decision.
An Oncatype DX test, tests the genes found in your breast tissue and cancer to see the chance of recurrence. Imagine a graph broken up into 3 parts. The first section is 1-18 and if you land there you don't need chemo. Next is 19-31 and you should probably get chemo, then there's 32-100 and you need chemo if your score lands there. My score was 19. Just past the "don't need it" section. My doc said he recommends it but won't push it one me. After a long discussion we just feel that because we've been so aggressive with kicking cancer it would be a shame to not go all the way and leave the door open to the tiny possibility of it coming back. He said I got a B+ on my onca test. So I decided to just do chemo. The good news is that it will only be 4 treatments which is why I didn't get a port put in my chest and they'll just do it through my hands. And I guess the treatments are more mild than normal chemo, but I'll still loose my hair and maybe be tired. He said there's a small chance I'd get nausea from it with all the anti nausea drugs they'll load me up on. The chance of it coming back if I didn't do chemo and just took tamoxifen is 12%. With chemo it's about 9%. So I'll do chemo for a couple months, 6 weeks later take tamoxifen for about a year, then 3 months later try to get pregnant (assuming we decided to have another baby) and then after the baby is born go back on tamoxifen for another 4 years. My first chemo treatment will be February 28th.
Some REALLY wicked fun news is....I get to go see WICKED!!!! I read the book a couple years ago and I am just so excited to see the musical! I heard it's better than the book! Jodie, Kathi and I are going on May 1st!!! So I have that to look forward to, which is nice :)
That's our crazy life in a nutshell right now, sorry if I seem to have too many run on sentences or if this post is just jam packed with info, I'm still a little loopy from surgery I think and probably should go to bed.
I'll leave you with a silly video of the boys.
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